I felt it for weeks now, I was running on empty! Kept postponing filling up, just a few days more, just a little rest, keep it up… and then I hit the empty wall.
It started with a severe nosebleed, blood was gushing out of my nose, off and on for about 13 hours. This was happening because I had a inflammation in my nasal cavity, which I chose to neglect, which inflamed because I neglected a flu and a severe cold. This starten mid december, and I ran on empty bij mid January. Still didn’t feel the need to chill and rest, so by the first week of February I was totally empty and bleeding from my head… W A K E U P C A L L ding ding ding!
Now I must say this kinda happens to me every year, not the totally empty part, but running on near empty. Mostly round this time of year, but this felt like really breaking and shutting down. I knew immediately I had done it again, and this time taken it to another level. So what do you do now? That is what went through my head, what to do now? I decided to do what felt best and that was attending to my bleeding nose, then get as much sleep as possible. Now I need to take care of myself physically and mentally, just take the rest I need, refuel, and get back to 100%.
I know you all know what I am talking about, and that you are thinking I should balance everything out. But I just do not balance well all the time, I am always searching for a better more efficient balance, I want to balance everything that is important to me out as much as possible, sharing the load over a plate, tipping it if it needs more here or there. Usually this works for me, but sometimes I take it to far, and than it starts taking the sizzle out of you. But the thing is, if you can re-balance, you are good. I didn’t check in for the flu, to heal up nicely, I kept on pushing, and that is that.
Back to basics, health is the most important thing, from health all other things I love and care about prosper, now I need to get my sizzle on point. You know what, I A M O N I T! We do not have to keep on pushing to do things that are not important. It is not worth it, because if you keep pushing, health breaks. The scary thing is that when it breaks, it might not be fixable anymore.
I just needed to hold myself accountable, I was blaming the flu and the cold, than I told myself I didn’t have time to be sick… bla… bla… bla… I am holding myself accountable for not getting better, the best, easiest, and smartest thing to do was to get better. So better late than never right?
Keep healthy sweeties,